How relationships can influence our health (in many ways) & our success

If you are surrounded with unhealthy people and have unhealthy relationships, you can’t lead a healthy lifestyle.

Learn how to assess your relationships and what it means to be in positive relationships. Also, learn why having a variety of relationships is beneficial. Understand the importance of boundaries.

You can be as harmful to your health by people than any other thing!

How we view ourselves and the people around us can influence our success. It can impact how we feel about ourselves.

Do you surround yourself with people who are negative?

You will see others who are constantly negative around you, and you’ll start to become negative yourself. Friends who aren’t concerned about their health, who smoke, eat poorly and drink excessively, will be more likely to have the same thoughts. You are less likely to be successful in your career if you only spend time with people who do not excel at their jobs and earn minimum wage. Friends who don’t accept you as you are will make you less likely to become that person. People who laugh at your goals and dreams will make it less likely that you will follow them.

An image of a group of friends to talk about how it is good to have relationships with a variety of different people.

If we surround ourselves with diverse people, we can become better versions of ourselves.

You don’t have to abandon friends going through difficult times in your life. It is a good idea to surround yourself with people who are positive.

What is a positive relationship?

You can only be happy in a relationship with people you respect, who support you and who accept you as you are. A healthy relationship requires trust, safety, kindness, empathy, boundaries, and respect. Happiness should be more important than unhappiness in a relationship.

Variety is the spice of life!

It is believed that success requires you to surround yourself with successful people. I find that ridiculous, unless you are looking for success and money, or being grateful for everything. I believe having many friends is better. It’s better to have friends from all walks, whether they are young, middle-aged or old, rich or poor, extroverts or introverts, and come from different cultures or countries. This is not to say that you don’t need as much diversity.

I believe we can all be better versions of our selves if we surround ourselves by many people. You can learn so much about yourself and the world. This is a personal choice. If you feel you need more variety, you might be right. You might consider expanding your circle if you have too many friends who are lazy, unhealthy, or see things in the same way as you. Although I am blessed with many friends, I don’t believe I have many people from all walks of life, incomes, or cultures. Although I would love to have more variety in my life, I am grateful for the ones I do have.

Boundaries are essential for relationships

Boundaries are guidelines that people set to guide others in how they behave (Hutchinson 2021). All of us have boundaries. When it comes to your relationships with others, it is important to establish boundaries. Boundaries could be as simple as how often you see someone or asking them to not gossip behind your back. Boundaries can be anything that makes you feel disrespectful, uncomfortable, or negatively affects your life. Be aware of people who will guilt you into doing something, push you to the limit, and make you feel bad about your life, your values, and your way of living.

While some people will never respect your boundaries, most relationships require you to communicate them. Some people won’t get it if you don’t communicate what your boundaries are. Some people, for example, are more introverted than others and require more alone time than someone who is more outgoing. Both my husband and I are introverts so we have a great understanding of the importance of time alone. It usually happens naturally, however, as we each have our own careers and hobbies. Sometimes we hit a brick wall and tell one another we need to be alone. This is usually me more often than him.

An image of a guy watching his girl walk out the door to talk about how you need to communicate your needs in a relationship and be considerate of how an introvert is different from an extrovert.

Introvert or Extrovert?

Our society is structured to favor extroverts more than introverts in many ways. This is unacceptable. Introverts must be clear about their boundaries. If you are unable to handle social interaction or need more meaningful conversations than small talk, it’s OK. Your introvert needs should be met and vice versa. You can be an introvert by making it a priority to have your extrovert friend plan activities while you’re at home. If you live with an extrovert, be sure to respect the needs of the introvert. Both can find ways to meet their needs.

This book is about living in an extrovert society. It was one of my favorite books. Quiet: How Introverts Can Make a Difference in a World that Talks All the Time Buy It Here.

Communication is an integral part of healthy relationships

My husband and me are the kind of couple that doesn’t fight, even though all our arguments are peaceful. Nobody ever gets upset or vocal. It is a peaceful place. I believe a lot of that is due to sharing everything, our feelings and being open to other’s opinions. Communication is essential. Healthy relationships can be navigated by listening, communicating, understanding, and being compassionate.

Toxic relationships

Two people sitting on opposite sides of the bed and dealing with some anger to talk about toxic relationships.

Many people will remain in toxic relationships their entire lives, even if it causes more stress than they are used to.

Is it worth it? It is not worth it, I think. You shouldn’t be trapped in a relationship because of guilt.

What is a unhealthy relationship?

It is partly a matter for opinion. Different people have different needs and different ways of managing relationships. You could have a relationship that is positive for others, but it can be negative for you. What could be the reason? Sometimes, it’s just about certain personalities working together, or a person being better at hiding their true nature. Other times, it could be that your surround yourself with toxic people. They often find themselves drawn to one another.

One example is a family member who gossips too much, gets into financial trouble, or is critical of others. While one person may be able see the positive traits of the other, you might find the relationship draining and detrimental to your happiness. This is something you should not feel guilty about. People often get trapped in toxic relationships simply because they don’t see the real picture. It’s easy to get blinded by toxic relationships, to see the positive and ignore the negative, or to feel guilty about ending a relationship.

How to deal with a toxic relationship?

What you do depends on how toxic your relationship is. You should not be with someone who is dangerous or abusive. You should end the relationship right away if you feel that someone is abusive, dangerous, or just plain mean. It is better to set boundaries and have a conversation to determine if the other person is open to making changes. Don’t wait too long. If these things fail to work, you might need to end the relationship. You don’t need to be a therapist. Every situation is unique.

Two people sitting back to back crying to talk about what is an unhealthy relationship.

No matter what others think, it doesn’t really matter what you feel about a relationship. You don’t have to be in a bad one. It might seem difficult, especially if you’ve been in a relationship that was abusive. It’s okay to seek out the right therapist for support. Do not sacrifice your values, happiness, health, or overall well-being.

It has been quite challenging for me. I have always been someone who puts in a lot of effort to make things work. As I grew older, however, I have learned that peace and self-love is more important than ever.

Forgiving is not forgiving

Sometimes we get so confused that we think we are not good people. You can be there for someone, but you may not need them back.

As a Christian, it’s possible to forgive someone for an offense, but you don’t have to live with them forever. Forgiveness is a good thing, but it doesn’t mean that you should forget. It is unhealthy to live in anger or hatred toward others. We should forgive ourselves and not others. It is how we move forward.

An image of two younger woman in an argument to talk about how forgiveness doesn't mean you forget or choose to keep them in your life.

Even if they have hurt me personally, I don’t wish any bad things on anyone. I still hope they find God and change for the better. Although this is not how I feel, I believe that spending more time learning about God has made a difference in my life.

Exercising in toxic relationships can lead to health problems

Chronic stress can be caused by toxic relationships. This is because chronic stress can lead to ongoing health problems, such as anxiety, depression, autoimmune disorders, and even cancer. It is not worth suffering from a toxic relationship. People who are involved in toxic relationships are more likely to neglect their self-care (eating well, exercising, etc.). This can also lead to sickness.

Experts concluded that toxic relationships could increase your risk of developing heart disease, high blood sugar and blood pressure, as well as a weaker immune system. (Dear Media).

Signs that a toxic relationship is in progress

There are many ways that relationships can go wrong and there are many ways they can become toxic. Let’s hear what experts have to say.

California-based psychologist and communication expert Dr. Lillian Glass says that she invented the term toxic relationships in 1995. She describes them as “any relationship between people who don’t support one another, where conflict exists and one seeks out to undermine the other (Ducharme 2018, 2018).

Therapists also mention lack of trust, disrespect patterns, ignoring your needs and controlling behaviors.

There are many more toxic signs in this article, but I don’t think it would be helpful to list them all without their descriptions. So take a look at: What is a Toxic relationship? 8 Types of toxic relationships and their signs.

Sometimes, it’s better to turn it around! This article outlines signs you should look out for in yourself and how they can help you determine if you’re in a toxic relationship: How toxic relationships affect mental health.

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Refer to

Ducharme, Jamie. (2018, June 5). TIME/HEALTHHOW TO TELL YOU IF YOU’RE IN a TOXIC RELATIONSHIP — and WHAT TO DO ABOUT It How to Tell if you’re in a toxic relationship — And What to Do About it Retrieved from:,other%2C%20where%20there’s%20competition%2C%20where

Dear Media/How toxic relationships affect mental health. Retrieved from:

Hutchinson, Tracy. Tracy Hutchinson, PH.D./What are Personal Boundaries? Retrieved from:,able%20to%20behave%20around%20them.&text=Setting%20boundaries%20can%20ensure%20that,respectful%2C%20appropriate%2C%20and%20caring.

How relationships impact our health (in multiple ways) and how we can achieve the wellness resolution.

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About the Author: Marty